Numbing

Feeling myself numbing..
from the outside in
Fighting it from the inside out.
To my core..
An ache that visits more frequently
Numbness inching its way nearer
This feeling in my chest..
Yearning to work its way out
Flowing of tears, mask the pain
Until the next strain..
Numbing.Numbing.Numbing.
Ya Allah please set me free.
Give me a feeling.
A light.
Ameen

A.S.

Ya Allah

Ya Allah..
Oh how I love you..
In a world you've built for me..
I've built my heart around You..
I can't live without you...
Yearning to return to where it All started..
I hope to see You again.


Ameen.

A.S.

Not a menu

There is so much that I want & wish to do for my loved ones.. and it tears me apart when I feel there is so much out of my hands. Some things I can't just make happen. Its not like life is like a menu & you take an order.. I suppose this is where the patience part is really supposed to kick in. But, in the meantime I struggle with myself with the feeling of uselessness when doing all that I can do, feels like it isn't enough. People can tell me otherwise, But it won't change what I feel in my heart. Ya Rab... bless us with the good in this life & the good in the next... Ameen.

  A.S.

Take a walk

Sometimes we need to break out of our own comfort zone & make an honest attempt to walk in someone else's shoes. At least try to have an understanding. Humility... compassion...

A.S.

That Girl

Looking back in time
A relationship that once was
Youthful..young & naive.
I feel for that girl, the heartache she endured.
Hope & dreams were JUST that.
Sorry for that girl, But not the women she escaped to be.
A relationship that needed growth..
Within' it..
She could not..
She never had a chance to BE.

A.S.

Spiraling

In Life
Through storm or sunny breeze
Stand rooted with Truth
Relationships come & go..
Whether friend, fo or next of kin
Circles we go
To love unconditionally
To forgive & forgive
To have patience when Life takes a turn
Circles we go.
Like a spiritual/emotional spiral..
Till the very end..





A.S.

Nocturnal

The day is long..
The night even longer.
Nocturnal.
Thoughts that keep this body.
Like clouds that continue to shift & take leave..
Body in a limbo..
Until my mind fatigues & body ceases
Will sleep find me.

A.S.

Lead us to Jannah

He is there..

For those that are patient.
For those that struggle for good.
For those pure of heart.
For those tormented and afflicted.

May our actions in this Life be good,moral & selfless...
May these ripples lead us to Jannah/Heaven..
INSHALLAH

To Allah we belong and to Him we shall return.

A.S.

Sometimes I feel like trying to be & being a good person isn't good enough. Yet that's all that I can be..

A.S.

Blood is blood

There are times you can’t help but sit back, or while going about your daily motions and reminisce of things come to pass.
Sometimes, I can’t help but wonder what it is you think I’ve actually ever done to you.. Nothing kept me from supporting, caring, and loving you. Blood is blood and what I felt for you was unconditional.. Despite everything & anything. Not because I was weak… or less than.. But that’s what family is for isn’t it???
We all grow up and some of us slower than others, But still in all we end up going our own ways. I never neglected or abandoned the relationship.. I too have a life and at times have a schedule to stick to. No different than anyone else.. or like yourself.
So one day you come to learn I’m a MUSLIM. That’s when it all changed between us. Not to say there wasn’t an effort on my part… You ignored me & gave me the cold shoulder. The first time you saw me in Hijab, you couldn’t look me in the face.. What’s so hard to see? I’m still Amie… I’m still me… I prayed..hoped…and cried over you despite your cruelness to me. I don’t think you even realize the ramifications of your actions, or lack of. Perhaps, my lifestyle cramps your style? I never judged you for yours, But judged for myself.
I’m sorry you’ve chosen this way & I’m sorry it still hurts me to this day.
My God is your God…

A.S.

Truth

The roof over our heads
May come crashing down...
From the inside out...
Or the outside in.
Home by tangible means will always change..
Depending where the wind blows by Allah's will..
But home of my heart..
I'll always strive to keep.
No matter the surroundings..
Through chaos and through calm
In my heart of hearts I'll stand firm
In total remembrance of Allah subhan wa ta'ala..
Instilled in my heart an unconditional love and awe of all that is..
His Promise.
Forever happy and nobody & nothing can take that from me.
There's no denying Truth.

A.S.