I Was There

I was there

I showed up…

I stayed longer than anyone saw

Longer than I probably should have…

I made choices

But they came with a cost

My time…

My body…

My quiet little life

Always waiting in the wings

While I held things together…

I tried to set boundaries

And maybe I did

But they blurred in the everyday

In the asking that didn’t sound like asking

In the way care becomes assumed

And mine was spent

Almost entirely…

I don’t regret what I gave

But I resent what was expected

The weight of it

The silence around it

The way it never paused to ask

if I was still okay…

And now

Now I feel it shifting

A door closing softly

No slam… just space

And in that space—

A man who stayed

A family that bloomed

While I was still holding the past together…

I miss you

And I also don’t want to go back

Not even for a moment…

This…

This breath

This beginning

This is the part that’s mine

—A